Sandbagged at the DMV

An episode at the office of the Dept. of Motor Vehicles during an eye exam for driving license renewal reminded be of an incident a few years ago. That situation, which happened at the airport in Merida, Mexico, was eerily reminiscent.

We were traveling with an elderly friend who was relocating to her house in Merida where she lived much of the year. Our friend was nearly blind and had a helper dog with her. In addition she had the most incredible collection of household and personal baggage imaginable, most of which barely qualified for import and certainly would be subject to careful inspection.

It was the last flight into Merida and we were the last passengers to arrive at the customs desk. This array prompted hurried conversations amongst the agents, glances at watches were frequent and some rolling of eyes. At that time, customs inspection in Merida was something of a lottery.
Upon presenting, one was instructed to push a large button and a green light meant pass through: a red meant close inspection of baggage.

Now a gambler who knew the system could do well betting on the winning color by the circumstances. Little old blind lady, guide dog, mountain of luggage, last flight, last passenger; bet the farm! We passed through post haste and were on our way.

Well, that same gambler could do well at the Department of Motor Vehicles. In our city, which has in some surveys has the greatest number of senior citizens in the entire country, an enterprising gambler could make a smart living . By observing the apparent age of each candidate for driving license renewal he could with total certainty predict the outcome of the vision test.

Granted in a community like ours the great numbers of elderly drivers is cause for concern. But...
if a person sees clearly enough to pass an eye test why should that not be sufficient to preclude license restricted to wearing eyeglasses? The test appears to be rigged for older drivers to assure failure.

One is required to look closely into a device (which may not have been sanitized in this century)
and follow verbal instructions. The screen in view has a series of lines as in found in other vision tests. There the comparison ends. One sees a cluster of four lines, clearly labeled 1 2 3 4. A gap, and another series of lines, three or perhaps four. Another gap, another series. The verbal instruction is to read line 5. Of course line 5 does not follow line 4 in the first line. Oh No, line five is buried in the third clutch of lines.

So the applicant starts off flustered and a bit shaken. I took the test not wearing my eyeglasses since I did not have an eyeglass need restriction on my current license. Well, I located the covert line 5 and it was totally unreadable. I could make out the lines preceding and following the dread #5, so I told the clerk it was looked Chinese to me.

"Put on your glasses and try again', says she. I did, and viola! , crystal clear...I aced it. " You will have a glasses restriction on your license". "Sandbagged" at the DMV! Is it a set-up? As in Mexico, I'm convinced there is a Pass/Fail Button somewhere at the DMV and I got the red light!

While waiting for my new license to be created I was able to listen to the testing of an elderly man at the next booth. He was struggling with the damn #5 line too! On the face of it, this is no big deal for me. I wear glasses all the time and have since I was in my teens. What I object to is the "Orwellian" process they seem to be using to further a given end. Sure, get the geezers who can't see off the road, but if you can pass the eye test even at one hundred; no need for license restriction. It's only fair.

Anybody know a hustler who wants to spend time making bets at the DMV?